Compassion

What a gift, to have someone as wise and as kind as the Dalai Lama to share his views on grand topics.  This is an excerpt from the book, "My Spiritual Journey" where the Dalai Lama shares his views on the meaning of life itself.

For me, in my own my search for happiness, I've found this to be so true.  The happiest times in my life involved deeply servicing and helping others.  And this continues to this day, as my new purpose and calling.

Enjoy!

Compassion, path to my happiness

A big question underlies our experience, whether or not we are aware of it: What is the meaning of life?  I have thought about this, and I would like to share my thoughts on this subject.

I believe that the aim of life is to be happy.  From birth, every human being aspires to happiness and does not want to suffer.  Social conditions, education, and ideology do not affect these tendencies of our deepest being.  That is why it is important to find out what will bring us the most happiness.

First, we divide happiness and suffering into two main categories, mental and physical.  But it is the mind that exercises the most influence over us.  Unless we are seriously ill or deprived of necessities, our physical condition plays a secondary role in life.  When the body is satisfied, we’re almost not aware of it.  The mind, on the other hand, registers the slightest event, no matter how minor it is.  So we must devote our effort to developing peace of mind.

According to my own experience, the highest level of inner calm comes from the development of love and compassion.  The more concerned we are with the happiness of others, the more we increase our own well-being.  Friendliness and warmth toward others relax mental tensions and help us to dissipate fears or insecurity so that we can overcome obstacles.  That is the ultimate source of success in life.

In this world, where we are bound to encounter difficulties, if we lose hope and become discouraged, we reduce our ability to face things.  What’s more, if we remember that everyone, not just ourselves, has to experience suffering, this realistic perspective reinforces our determination and our ability to overcome difficulty.  In fact, with this attitude, every new obstacle will be regarded as a good opportunity to improve our state of mind!

That is how we can gradually strive for more compassion- by cultivating both real sympathy when faced with suffering of others and a desire to help them free themselves of it.  In this way our own serenity and inner strength will increase.

--Dalai Lama, From the book “My Spiritual Journey”

It's okay to be, not okay to stay

I've been thinking quite a bit about life's issues and problems, the things we all face that cause us stress, anxiety, worry, and all kinds of negative emotions.  Of course, these things, left unchecked, have physiological effects on us, cause our bodies and minds harm, and generally are not good for us.

What's given me peace lately are some words I just happened upon.  I don't really know if I made this up myself, if I heard from some other person, or read it somewhere.  In the end, it doesn't matter, just take the meaning of the words, and what type of positive effect it can have, and make it work for you.

It's okay to be mad, but not okay to stay mad.
It's okay to be hurt, but not okay to stay hurt.
It's okay to be selfish, but not okay to stay selfish. 
It's okay to be jealous, but not okay to stay jealous.
It's okay to be unhappy, but not okay to stay unhappy.

You get the point?  On the opposite end, of course, I think it's perfectly fine to strive to always be calm, pain-free, giving, understanding, and happy.  There's nothing wrong with that.  But, I think the message for me is to accept the times in my life where I am imperfect, and therefore accept the times in my life when other people or events are imperfect.  Accept them for what they are, be okay with them.  But, then, get on with life's beauty and positive energy, and move forward toward something better.

To me, it's okay to have or experience negative energy, it's natural, it's going to happen.  I should welcome those times and events with open arms, greet them like an old friend, invite them in for nice meal and a warm drink and friendly conversation.  And accept them for their value, lesson, and effect on my life.  But, then when the time comes, say goodbye and wish them well, and make room for the million other visitors that bring positive energy to my life, and welcome them in exactly the same way.

My dear friend who may be reading this, I pray for you, that you may accept life's hardships, no matter how they come at you, and deal with them as God would, lovingly accept them, be at peace, and move forward to the best and brightest of life's many moments.  May God Bless you always.  :)

Giving for the sake of Giving

I was recently asked by a friend of mine to translate a very famous Buddhist poem and describe it's meaning.  Being quite a formidable challenge, my friend said I could expect quite a reward if I was indeed able to accurately translate and demonstrate a complete understanding of the poem. Of course, in my humility, I mentioned to my friend that I wouldn't expect any reward at all, but my curiosity was peaked, mostly because I wanted to understand why that poem was chosen, why it was a favorite of my friend, and it's deep and famous meaning.

Suffice it to say, with a bit of effort, I was able to find the information necessary to understand how to piece the information together to form a coherent theory.  And with a bit more work, craft an explanation describing the history behind the poem, as well as my interpretation of it.  My friend was quite impressed with the work, and mentioned again about the reward promised.  I answered that I would not ask for anything at all, because it would defeat the purpose of the poem itself, which discussed "Giving for the sake of Giving".  For me, examining my heart and soul, it felt like the right thing to do, simply to solve the challenge.  Give, if you will, a very humble answer, and then follow the true meaning of the message the challenge was trying to convey by having no expectation or reward for accomplishing the goal.

Even this very blog entry goes against the poem itself, because really I shouldn't be touting anything I've done.  But, on the other hand, I want my children and one-day, my grandchildren, to understand this because it meant a lot to me.  I know you will ask what the poem was, that's something I will keep to myself.  But suffice to say, it's one of the most beautiful poems I've ever happened upon.

I pray for you, my friend, who may be reading this.  That you may be blessed to have the opportunity to give simply for the sake of giving, not expecting anything in return, but purely for the act of giving itself, because it is the right thing to do.  May God Bless You Always.

Keeping Your Promise

My youngest daughter and I spent the better part of the afternoon together, just the two of us.  Of course, I promised her the day before it would just be me and her, and she was looking forward to it.  Her sisters both had parties to attend, so it was just the two of us, and a long weekend day, sunny and beautiful to spend it together.  I had been out late the night before, celebrating with friends, so I was a bit tired.  I had gotten up early on just a few hours of sleep, to run an exercise bootcamp I'm quite proud of.  So, suffice to say, come mid-afternoon, my energy levels were depleted and my promise of spending time with daughter now in the balance, I gave a hint of hesitation.

Needless to say, I saw my daughter's body language, slumped shoulders, sad face, energy sapped from her, tears starting to flow, and I asked her if she was okay.  And of course, she wasn't.  She wasn't bummed that we were may not go to the movies or get what she wanted, she was bummed because I promised her something, and I was hesitant.

I guess when you want something so bad, in this case, my daugther wanting to spend time with her daddy, when it's taken away, it hurts.  I understand that, and that's why I thought it over, gathered up my energy, and said, "You know what ... let's go!"  and it was the best decision I've made in a long while.

My friend who may be reading this ... for your own well being, try to keep your promises and hold true to your word.  We are all imperfect by nature, which is fine, but in realizing how our thoughts and actions can affect another person, we can strive to be more compassionate, and in turn, be better ourselves.

Solomon

If I ever have a son, his name will be "Solomon".  And here's why:

Kings 3:5-15

5 At Gibeon the Lord appeared to Solomon during the night in a dream, and God said, “Ask for whatever you want me to give you.”

6 Solomon answered, “You have shown great kindness to your servant, my father David, because he was faithful to you and righteous and upright in heart. You have continued this great kindness to him and have given him a son to sit on his throne this very day.

7 “Now, O Lord my God, you have made your servant king in place of my father David. But I am only a little child and do not know how to carry out my duties. 

8 Your servant is here among the people you have chosen, a great people, too numerous to count or number.  

9 So give your servant a discerning heart to govern your people and to distinguish between right and wrong. For who is able to govern this great people of yours?”

10 The Lord was pleased that Solomon had asked for this.

11 So God said to him, “Since you have asked for this and not for long life or wealth for yourself, nor have asked for the death of your enemies but for discernment in administering justice,  

12 I will do what you have asked. I will give you a wise and discerning heart, so that there will never have been anyone like you, nor will there ever be.

13 Moreover, I will give you what you have not asked for—both riches and honor—so that in your lifetime you will have no equal among kings.

14 And if you walk in my ways and obey my statutes and commands as David your father did, I will give you a long life.”

15 Then Solomon awoke—and he realized it had been a dream.

Losing Fat - The Workout

Okay, so we've established from the last post that "losing fat" is much more important (and difficult) than simply "losing weight," which could include muscle and water.

So the question begs, how can we tweak the example workout in the previous post to be more efficient?  It's actually quite simple.  Three steps:

1.) Reverse the order - weights first, cardio second
2.) Change the muscle groups - from small muscles to large muscles, and in the right order
3.) Do 12 reps, with the 12th rep being tough to complete

Let's go over these one-at-a-time.

1.) Reverse the order - weights first, cardio second.  Why?  Because it burns fat more efficiently.  In short, lifting weights first (with large muscle groups in the right order -- see #2 in a bit) will deplete your body's stored energy (glycogen) faster than cardio itself (unless it's high intensity interval training or HIIT style of cardio).  You need to do that in order to use fat as fuel.  So, if you lift weights first, your cardio afterwards will be to burn mostly fat.  Also, after you're done, your body will continue to burn calories due to EPOC (excess post oxygen consumption) because your muscles, worked via weights, need energy to recover.  The other way around simply burns less fat.

2.) Change the muscle groups.  Why?  In short, because larger muscles, exercised in the right order, will cause you to burn more energy (glycogen) and thus more calories, and get you into your fat tank faster.  Hips ab/adductors, arms, and core are all considered Type I small muscles, and they do not require a lot of energy to work.  Contrast this with your legs (quads, hamstrings, and glutes), chest, back (lats), and shoulders.  These are primarily Type II muscles, which produce a lot of force and power, but require a lot of energy.  Weight train in this order: Legs, Chest, Back, Shoulders (LCBS).  Largest muscles first, then separate your chest and shoulders with back, so it's a Push->Pull->Push workout, better balance, and more rest for your triceps, which work in most "Push" exercise.  LCBS, don't forget that order, it's important.

3.) Do 12 reps, with the 12th rep being tough to complete.  Most folks lift either way too light (gals) or way too heavy (guys).  Do 12 reps, this is in the "Endurance" range, best for weight loss.  Don't worry, gals, you won't get big and bulky (more on that in another post).  And guys, put your ego aside, have good form, lower your weight, go through a full range-of-motion, without swinging and using momentum, and get 12 good reps.  And do that for 3+ sets.

Here's a simple program you could complete in about 1 hour, do each for 3 sets of 12 reps, progressively adding weight until the 12th rep becomes tough to complete, resting 1 minute or less between sets.  Always error on the side of caution, rest as needed, especially if you are just starting out.

• Dynamic Warmup - (5 minutes)
• Legs - Squats (3x12)
• Chest - Bench (3x12)
• Back - Lat Pulldowns (3x12)
• Shoulders - Arnold Press with Dumbbells (3x12)
• Cardio - Elliptical or Treadmill, any pace (20 minutes)
• Cooldown/Stretch - (10 minutes)

If you follow these simple changes, your "fat-loss" workout will be more optimal.

Losing Fat

Nearly 5 months into my Personal Training studies, and I've learned so much about the human body, about nutrition, about the body's energy systems, about workouts, and about a lot of other details I'd have trouble listing down.  To be sure, it's been a worthwhile journey, something I will always look fondly on, and will be a part of me forever.  It's the foundation for a lifetime of continued learning, and I want to pursue this at the highest levels next, something I will gear up for and achieve.

Probably the single most important concept I've learned is how the body uses (and loses) fat most efficiently.  Most people want to lose weight, I think that's the observation I've made when seeing people with trainers in the gym, and people in the gym in general.

You look at the layout of a gym, and it's really geared towards people who want to lose weight.  About 50% or more of a gym is filled with cardio machines, space for spinning, yoga, zumba, or other cardio or fitness classes.  About 25% is filled with weight "machines" meant more for novices to weight training and such.  And about 25% or less is filled with free weights or more advanced weight training equipment.  Of course, that's generic, and just the gyms I've visited in the past few years.  You'll always have your exceptions, like Gold's Gym, which caters towards a different crowd, and has a different layout.  But, the popular gyms like 24, ClubOne, ClueSport, or Equinox typically have this type of breakdown, catering to their clientele.

Most people think that a scale determines your weight, and hence your overall fitness.  If the scale reads lower, then that's good.  If it reads higher, that's bad.  They measure their progress strictly by how many pounds are measured on their scale.  So, "losing weight" is simply "losing pounds", and for most folks, it doesn't matter where those pounds come from, just as long as the scale is lower.

Take, for example, a typical female who wants to lose weight.  Her routine is to static stretch, then jog/run on a treadmill for 30 minutes, then do some targeted resistance training, maybe some hip ad/abductor machines, some core work, and some arms.  She'll do zumba, dance, maybe squeeze in a spinning class, a yoga class, or a body pump class to mix it up.  She'll do this for years and probably be fit, have great cardio, lose a few pounds, and probably look and feel much better than she did when she started.  So, the question is, what's wrong with that?

Well, nothing's "wrong" with that at all.  That's great!  And it's much better than another person who didn't do anything for as many years.  But, the main issue is the efficiency at which she reached her goals, and what she actually "lost" in terms of weight in the process.

Let's rewind a bit and take some measurements of the female before she started her routine.  Let's say she initially weighed 5'2", 165 lbs,was 35 years old, and had 40% body fat.  Technically, her BMI (at 30.18) and her body fat percentage (>32%) would put her in the "Obese" Category.  A good goal for her could be a BMI of 24.9, which is a "normal" BMI.  This would be 135 lbs.  That's 30 lbs. lost ... 30 lbs of FAT!

Let me say that again, 30 lbs. of FAT!  At 165 lbs and 35% body fat, she would have 66 lbs. of fat.  If she lost 30 lbs. of FAT and maintained her lean body mass (the rest minus the fat), she would weigh 135 lbs and at 26.7% body fat.  That would be an amazing accomplishment, to lose 13.3% of her body fat. To do that safely, and with everything ideal, it would take between 15-30 weeks to lose those 30 lbs. of fat.

Now, contrast this to a case where you just talked about weight.  Lose 30 lbs. sure.  But if those 30 lbs. were 10 lbs of fat, 15 lbs. of muscle, and 5 lbs. of water, would that be the same thing?  Obviously not!  Losing muscle to lose weight is not good.  Losing water to lose weight is not good.  What matters most is the fat loss, losing the excess adipose tissue, which can be so detrimental to your health.

The next question is ... how do we tweak what the female did in terms of working out to maximize the efficiency of the fat burn?  Good question ... wait for the next blog entry and I'll share that with you.